this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
