hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
