tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
