Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
