he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
