I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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