Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize
