i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize