dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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