So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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