walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
