A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
