...so i touched it.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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