I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
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