I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
