People in love make me want to vomit
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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