Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
