who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
