you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
