hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize