is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
