KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I am full of burrito and curiosity
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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