its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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