I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
