Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
