i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
