They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
