i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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