just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
