did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
