He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
