How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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