I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
