One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
