We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
