I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
