Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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