which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
