Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
