how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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