Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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