we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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