do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
