I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
