There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
he's gonorrhea incarnate
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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