3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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