Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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