He is such a slut. More and more my type.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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