I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
