so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
